Story Time – When your best doesn’t feel good enough

I’ve been frustrated, guys. The second half of this year hasn’t quite looked as I had hoped it would… Back at the end of July, I was in a fender bender that I initially thought was “no big deal” and assumed I’d easily bounce back from, but things have not gone quite as planned since then.

My body is still trying to work through any trauma it experienced, and with that, my physical abilities have changed, limiting my ability to do the things I love. I have a goal of hitting a 300 lb deadlift. That goal has certainly been put on pause in addition to lifting any weights heavier than 20 lbs. Then even my ability to dance (and teach) has been diminished, needing to modify my movement.

This has been hard. Dance is a part of my identity, and not being able to express myself through dance the way I normally would has me feeling like a part of me is missing. I know any dancer who’s ever experienced an injury gets this. I know I’m not alone. 

I don’t share this with you to get your pity. I just want to be real about where I’m at right now. This has been a journey, and I think I’m now at the point of being able to try to reincorporate some of the movement I’ve had to reduce. I’ve started taking some lower intensity workout classes, like Barre. And to be honest, it’s been humbling. The way I look in these classes is very different from when I used to take these classes all the time in previous years. I’ve got to take things slower and not go as “full out” as I normally would. And holy sore! My body is definitely adjusting to this movement again. 

So what’s the moral of my story?

Keep going! Do what you can. “Your best” will look different in different seasons. Right now, my best is modifying movement and keeping things lighter but ensuring that I don’t stop moving. This is just a season, and I’m confident that it will take me into a new season of stronger movement in the future. But for now, I’m giving my best. 

I want to encourage you to check in with yourself. Do you feel you’re giving your best considering the current season of life you’re in? That’s not for me to answer, and it’s something that you’ve got to be honest with yourself about. But it might be the case that you need to adjust your expectations for yourself so you can positively move forward. 

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